Doing What Works for Me
On a windy, cold morning this past week, I met up with a friend who is quite different from me in many respects. She is conservative, and I am not. She has been a successful small business owner, and I am not. She has been married to the same man for many years; I have not. Yet beyond all of these differences, there is a similarity; the desire to enlarge our world. We met through a Twelve-step program, and over time became friends.
When we met for breakfast, it was to catch up. We always stay in contact with a text here and there, but not much physical connection. My friend has been busy transitioning quite beautifully from one business into another. I say beautifully because although the industry she is going into is different from the one she left, her years of previous experience are a strong foundation for her further success in the new role she has chosen.
I, on the other hand, am still looking for full-time employment. I used to say that I was pretty good at looking for work because it was the only thing that was consistent in my life. However, that's not very optimistic and sort of rude to my be-ing. What is apparent to both of us is the way the job search industry currently operates is, well, detrimental to the job seeker. It’s soul-less and heart-less, and I find myself getting more depressed - which always leads me to fall back on taking whatever job offer I receive out of desperation because I need a job!
Although, there is always something to learn in the process.
Did I tell you about how I got my current PT job? I was sitting at the computer doing the job search thing when I came across a posting for a PT cashier at a local health food store. I knew the store, had spoken to one of the owners in the past, and have lived a healthy lifestyle since being introduced to it in my early twenties. I wanted that job. So, I shut down the computer, changed my clothes, and drove to the health food store. I walked in, asked for the manager or owner, and proceeded to let him know that I wanted the job and that I was a great fit. I filled out an application, left my resume, and left. A few days later, I received a call asking me when I wanted to start.
Sometime during this past week, while experiencing yet another depressing day, I thought about how I got the job at the health food store. I also remembered how I used to dress for success, and with a map of businesses I wanted to work at, I went from place to place, introducing myself and asking to speak to the manager or owner. They got to see the real me. Not the person picked by a computer or someone in HR because my resume “had all the right words.”
I didn’t go into an interview trying too hard to impress upon them my value or worth. I wasn’t quietly and desperately shouting out through my answers to their questions, “pick me, pick me”! I was always fresh and excited.
So, as my friend and I hashed things out over eggs benedict and chicken fried steak, we both agreed that what I was doing and had been doing these many months/years wasn’t working. Sure, I would find a job, but at what price? The cost of losing my heart and soul? The despair and anguish showed up at least two or three times a week, looking for work on a computer. The exhaustion of submitting my reworked resume to match their specific job description, following up with a call to the employer only to be told they are still looking and would get back to me - but never hearing back?!
Although the Eggs Benedict was okay, and the conversation - sometimes aggressive on her part (remember: she’s had a successful career and can’t relate with my career path), I left with a feeling of hope and empowerment. I decided that it was time to retake control of the way I looked for work. Don’t get me wrong, that fear’s there, considering I’m no longer a Twenty or Thirty-something woman.
What I do know is that people tell me how much they enjoy my smile and my energy. If I can give the decision-maker an opportunity to read my resume and see the person I am without all of the desperation, I know my “good fit” job search will bring outstanding results. It will take more effort; it’s not an easy button, and we’re heading into winter, but the benefit is that I am in control of my job search. I get dressed and am out the door every day, entering businesses where I WANT to work, smiling, reaching out my hand, and saying, “Hi, my name is Jonella. Is your manager available”?
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